regret

A surge of regret swarms me. All of a sudden, I feel like that I made a huge mistake. But it’s too late to take it back now. Changing my mind is no longer an option. I can’t return to the past and reverse my actions. I was reluctant. I was unsure. I was doubtful. Despite of all, I still went ahead. I made a decision. Now, I somehow regret it. I shouldn’t feel this way… I should be thrilled. My heart should be leaping for exhilaration. I should be snowed under gladness. Ironically, I feel that my heart crawled up my throat. I’m scared, not thrilled. My inside is quivering with anxiety, not for exhilaration. I’m overwhelmed with worries, not with gladness. What’s the matter with me? Why do not I feel any ounce of pleasure?