at 24

The other day I was reading my blog entry for my birthday last year. As I look back at my thoughts about turning 23, my thoughts about turning 24 were formed. I would like to think that much changed since last year. I would like to believe that the 365 days passed since I turned 23 seasoned me to become a more assertive 24. I won’t deny that I still get easily frustrated when things don’t go my way. I won’t deny that I easily get infuriated at slightest provocation. I still feel depressed from time to time but could bounce back faster now. As I try to remember the year had passed, I can’t help to reminisce my life since I’ve been here in the desert. My journey has been a story of God…a story of His faithfulness in the life of a not so faithful person. My life here has been like a rollercoaster ride. Just when I thought things couldn’t be worse they become horrendous. Just when I thought that I couldn’t be more depressed, God is always there, pulling me out of my misery. Until now there are a lot of things I don’t understand. But at 24 I realized that not all things are meant to understand.  They happen because God allow them to. My faith tells me there are reasons for everything. But my faith doesn’t tell me what exactly those reasons are. In God’s time they are revealed. But they’re just being impressed in me, it’s still up to me to discern them. Yet there are times revelation doesn’t come and my patience takes best of me. So instead of facing my troubles, I spend my energy trying to make sense of them only to come up with a premature, worse, a make-believe conclusion why things happen in my life. At 24, I’ve learned to focus my time and energy dealing with whatever my circumstances are…good or bad. In due time, God will reveal their purpose. That’s God’s business. My business is to live a faithful life regardless of my situation.